News and Views

By ROBERT RECTOR

A few items of interest you may have missed recently from news reports, blogs, web sites and other highly suspect sources.

News: Paris Hilton reportedly ordered her helicopter pilot to make an emergency landing on a German farm - so she could use the toilet.
The actress was said to be touring the European country when she made the surprise request.
A source told Britain's More magazine: "She gave the farmer a bit of a shock. Her bouncers even blocked the farm door so the family couldn't go inside their own house while she was using the loo."
The star then allegedly spent another 10 minutes on the startled farmer's porch, so she could smoke a cigarette.
The unnamed farmer said: "She was cold as a fish, and cursed about the weather."
Views: The Germans must be sick of us. First, our World Cup team, then Paris Hilton. The end results both smelled.

News: BOCA RATON, Fla. - A hundred bucks might buy you more than six dozen burgers from McDonald's, but the swanky Old Homestead Steakhouse will sell you one brawny beef sandwich for the same price.
Boca Raton Mayor Steven Abrams could barely speak between bites as he devoured the 20-ounce, $100 hamburger billed as the "beluga caviar of sandwiches."
"Heaven on a bun," restaurant owner Marc Sherry said.
The burger debuted at the restaurant in the Boca Raton Resort and Club, where a membership costs $40,000 and an additional $3,600 a year.
The bill for one burger, with garnishing that includes organic greens, exotic mushrooms and tomatoes, comes out to $124.50 with tax and an 18 percent tip included. The restaurant will donate $10 from each sale to the Make-A-Wish Foundation.
Views: May I suggest a Dom Perignon "Oenotheque" 1966 to go with that? At $1500 a bottle, it would be perfect to wash dowm a burger. And don't even dwell on the fact that some guy in the kitchen feeds his family on less than you paid for your sandwich and a membership.

News: BAGHDAD (Reuters) - Saddam Hussein ended a brief hunger strike after missing just one meal in his U.S.-run prison, a U.S. military spokesman said Friday.
The former Iraqi leader had refused lunch Thursday in protest at the killing of one of his lawyers by gunmen, but the spokesman said he ate his evening meal.
Views: Maybe they offered him one of those $100 Old Homestead Steakhouse burgers.

News: One sunny afternoon in January, Vicki Chandler, a 55-year-old underwriting associate at Cigna HealthCare in Chattanooga, Tenn., was walking to her car when a teenager in loose khaki pants approached her, pointed to her pocketbook and said, "I need that." As she recounts the incident, he snatched the purse and took off.
But then he ran into trouble. As he ran, his loose trousers slipped down below his hips. As he reached down to hold them up, the teen was forced to throw the purse aside.
It's a problem for perpetrators. Young men and teens wearing low-slung, baggy pants fairly regularly get tripped up in their getaways, a development that has given amused police officers and law-abiding citizens a welcome edge in the fight against crime.
Views: Finally, a fashion trend we can get behind. Next for the super hip (and criminally inclined): Tying your shoe laces together.

News: When lifelong musician Roger Busdicker died last week, his daughters made the final arrangements: They had his cremated remains buried in his clarinet.
Views: Please don't stick my ashes in my keyboard or scatter them is some musty old newsroom. I've asked for my remains to be put in the cup on the 18th hole of my local golf course. Based on my friends' skills, they will remain undisturbed for a long time.