He Ain't Kinky, He's the Governor

When it comes to celebrity politicians, nobody beats California.
This is home to Hollywood, after all, and when the cast includes Ronald Reagan, George Murphy, Sonny Bono, Clint Eastwood and, of course, Arnold Schwarzenegger, it's a tough act to follow.
But Texas is trying.
After nailing down the White House and the national championship in college football, the good folks of Texas are mulling the candidacy of what passes for celebrity in those parts.
We speak, of course, of Kinky Friedman.
Never heard of him? Well, Kinky, a country and western singer of sorts, achieved a considerable cult following back in the 70s and 80s. His group, Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jew Boys, produced such notable hits as "They Don't Make Jews Like Jesus Anymore" and the ever popular "Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in Bed."
Now, Kinky has his eyes focused on the governor's mansion in Austin. And while his critics claim he's all hat and no cattle, he's out riding the campaign trail.
Indeed, according to media reports, Friedman has raised three times as much campaign money in his independent bid for governor as the two top Democratic candidates combined. Which may mean he is a popular and engaging candidate. Or it may be a statement on the fortunes of Democratic politics in Texas.
However you want to slice it, former U.S. Rep. Chris Bell raised $355,000 in the last six months, and one-time state Supreme Court Justice Bob Gammage collected $67,000. By comparison, Friedman reported raising $1.5 million.
And talk about well connected: Friedman is friends with Bill Clinton and George W. Bush, both of whom have invited him to visit the White House.
Kinky is no carpetbager. He was raised on a ranch in central Texas and graduated from the University of Texas before serving in the Peace Corps.
He currently lives at Echo Hill Ranch, just outside of Medina. He founded Utopia Animal Rescue Ranch, whose mission is to care for stray, abused and aging animals; more than 1,000 dogs have been saved from euthanasia.
His candidacy has propelled him onto the national stage; he recently appeared on "60 Minutes" where he observed, "Politics, folks, is the only field where the more experience you have, the worse you get."
And he has a clear vision of what the job he seeks entails: "The governor of Texas, as you know, does not have his finger on the nuclear button. He's more like the judge in a chili cook-off."
His campaign slogans include, "How Hard Could It Be?" and "Why The Hell Not?" Other bumper stickers retort: "My Governor is a Jewish Cowboy", and "He Ain't Kinky, he's my Governor".
But seriously folks. Here is Kinky on the issues:
"Texas politics stinks. The parties sell themselves to big donors, lobbyists control the legislature's agenda, and the top fundraising groups in the state are being indicted for money laundering. Corruption and big money have such a chokehold that the two major parties blew $100 million in the last governor's race to elect a candidate to a job that pays $100,000 a year.
"Texans are the most independent people in America, and if we're going to be inspired, the inspiration will come from someone unafraid to deal in new ideas and honest answers, an independent leader who lets the people call the plays instead of dancing to the tune of the money men. "
"That kind of leader is never going to look or sound like a politician. He won't steer by image polls, speak in hollow phrases approved by focus groups, or show up in hand-tailored suits. You'll know him when you see him -- true Texas leaders are unmistakable. After all, the last independent governor of Texas was Sam Houston. The next will be Kinky Friedman."
He supports higher pay for teachers and has proposed financing public education through the legalization of video poker terminals in bars: Slots for Tots.
On social issues he has supported gay marriage, answering an AP reporter's question on subject, he remarked "I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us." He supports nondenominational prayer in schools. In fact, his Christmas cards read, "May the God of your choice bless you and yours this holiday season."
And just before you laugh too loud and too long, know this: Two of his top campaign advisers worked for another outrageous and underfunded candidate who achieved the unexpected: Jesse Ventura.