Cookies and Commies

I ran into a gaggle of Girl Scouts in front of the market the other
day, enthusiastically selling their famous cookies that seem to
appear like clockwork each year at precisely this time.

I respectfully declined. I’m still at war with my post-holiday diet
and while my mind whispers yes, my waistline screams no.

Besides, I’ve been through my Girl Scout cookie phase. With two
daughters, four nieces and dozens of friends with female children, I
was awash in a sea of thin mints, lemon chalet creams and samoas for
years, primarily as a consumer.

And a willing one. The Girls Scouts were a positive experience for my
kids. This year, the Girl Scouts celebrate 100 years and remain a
tradition well worth admiring and encouraging.

Or so I thought.

Then I read where an Indiana lawmaker has labeled the Girls Scouts a
radical organization that promotes homosexuality and abortion and is
out to destroy American values.

That opinion was offered by a Indiana GOP state representative named
Bob Morris who believes the Girl Scouts encourage sexual activity,
are a front for Planned Parenthood, and that scouts are encouraged to
study role models who endorse feminist, lesbian and Communist
agendas.

It would be easy to dismiss Mr. Morris as a rogue whacko except that
this same sort of garbage has been making its way around the Internet
for some time, promoted by people who from time to time emerge from
under a rock to proclaim themselves protectors of the American way of
life.

Morris said he made his startling discoveries after talking to some
“knowledgeable constituents” and conducting "a small amount of
Web-based research.”

I did some research as well and found the following: The national
Girl Scouts organization has no relationship with Planned Parenthood.
Local chapters are autonomous and can partner with anyone they
choose, be it Planned Parenthood or the Republican National
Committee. There is no evidence they very many have done either.

What Morris’ research should have shown is that the Girl Scouts are
dedicated to empowering girls and helping to teach honesty, fairness,
courage, compassion, character, sisterhood, confidence and
citizenship through activities including camping and community
service.

Which sound like admirable values, at least in the part of America I
occupy.

Mr. Morris reveals his real agenda when he proclaims, “The fact that
the honorary president of the Girl Scouts is Michelle Obama and the
Obamas are radically pro-abortion and vigorously support the agenda
of Planned Parenthood should give each of us reason to pause before
or individual or collective endorsement of the organization.”

He fails to note than other honorary presidents of the Girl Scouts
include such radical feminists as Mamie Eisenhower, Nancy Reagan,
Barbara and Laura Bush.

As to that communist/feminist/lesbian stuff, a group called Family
Watch International complains on its web site that Girl Scout
literature offers as role models Frances Perkins, America’s first
female Cabinet secretary; Rigoberta Menchu, the Guatemalan activist
and Nobel Peace Prize winner; and Bette Midler, the singer and
actress, according to a story in the Washington Post.

The site sends readers to a page that identifies Perkins as
“lesbian,” Menchu as “Marxist” and Midler as “advocate for homosexual
rights.”

Missing in this rant is that the Girl Scouts also offer as role
models Mother Theresa and Clara Barton. They do not promote Snooki,
Lady GaGa or Lindsay Lohan.

Planned Parenthood has released a statement denying any connection to
the scouting group. National Girl Scouts officers say the group “does
not take a position or develop materials on issues related to human
sexuality and we do not have a national relationship with Planned
Parenthood.”

Asked why he thinks the Girl Scouts support abortion, Morris
said,"They're not against it. If you're not against it, you're for
it."

Which wins him a merit badge for stupidity.

In the meantime, I’m headed back to the market to buy a couple of
cases of cookies. I’m betting the money I spend will make a great
country greater.